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on the first day i knew i loved her,
under a swingset,
i said to myself, "this is gonna happen."
like suns rising on planets, like moons and stars
sharing skies, as if matter and energy agreed.
so i'm supposed to tell you it never happened.
and maybe it won't.
maybe i won't
see her
again.
maybe i will.
each day we time our walks through life
measuring and keeping diagrams and models
laid out needing coordinates and organ
donors placing blood in the surgical
procedures ornately abling calculation's
gravest algebraic machinations, grand
yearnings and heartbreaks, aches and
overtures hecking and heavenly fate
fed.
filed away. these reports of caged animals,
destiny captured through tranquilizers.
i will always love her.
that is the i can.
the all i can do.
living under chaos, i can
bring a heartbeat
bell that will
make life like light well
regardless of lack removing luster.
i can still swing in the darkness alone.
wind will my ears hearing make me smile alive like and feel smoothing
i would have had not alone.
i have the all here.
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